Dreams & Nightmares
About this issue
It’s a well known fact that everyone dreams. Each individual experiences their own, personalized dreams and nightmares. Whether literal or theoretical, we (the Images staff) wanted to know what the students of Rockland High dream of. Fall down the rabbit hole with the first webzine of the 2016-2017 school year.
Light cuts the glass of the dark
Invading through the window shades
Hitting the walls with orange glows
That illuminate the room with Halloween haunts
The nightmares come up from the pages
Circling in front of me
Tornadoes upon hurricanes of false reality
Hands to my head, elbows on my knees
Awake at the dead of dawn wondering "what the hell happened to me?"
Going back to toss and turn again
To be haunted by night terrors again
Going back and forth from knowing and not
The nightmares come up from the pages
Pages written by myself and the ones before me
Passed down like a legacy
And it's endless, a curse that runs in the blood
Some days it feels like freedom is only a dream
But the nightmares I've seen aren't what make up me
They won't take me
Because if there's one thing I've learned from watching nightmares come alive
It's what my fears really are, and what will burn them to the ground
Welcome to this unknown world. Oh, were you expecting something different? Maybe trees and wildlife, or maybe a technologically advanced society, or perhaps, life itself? Oh no, you won’t find any life here. It’s a desolate land. “Where am I?” you ask.
“Are you really still confused?” he scoffed.
“What are you doing here? Where am I?!” you cried.
“You have no idea where we are, where you are, do you? Well, here is a simple answer: We, excuse me, you, are in your mind; to be precise, in your dream world.”
“So then why are you in my dreams,” you stuttered, “and why does it look like an absolute wasteland?”
“Here’s one more answer for you. I am not really here. I am just the last person you thought of before you fell into this slumber. Why? Because I am the last person to have terrorized you until you broke. I am the person who cursed you. You want to know why your dreams have been distorted into nightmares? Oh it’s oh so simple. My curse on you has shattered your once bright and happy world. And now your body is your own tomb. It’s a cruel fate, isn’t it?” A sly, wicked smile spread across his face.
“You stared back in disbelief. “No... NO! I can’t be... No...” Oh how pathetic you looked paralyzed on the ground.
“That’s right.” He released his deliciously evil laugh, “Welcome to your absolute zero. Your most dreadful nightmare.”
I awoke to a world filled with mystery and wonder.
The sky was a deep plum purple,
and the clouds were neither liquid nor air,
but roamed the sky without a care.
Below the sky, the earth molded around your feet with every step,
like it was memory foam.
The air then started to have a metallic taste, I then discover why when up ahead were beautiful fields of delicate silver straw swaying in the wind.
On my stroll I turned left into a forest.
The ground was moist and gave off an earthy scent.
I don’t know how much time I spent,
strolling and taking in the foliage.
The trees seemed to be traveling through the seasons in a rapid pace
I stared in awe as the scarlet and brown of autumn appeared,
But was soon replaced by the bareness of winter.
Which then gave way to the emerald green of spring and summer
I observed this and did not blink fearing I would miss a season.
It was as if the forest was indecisive,
and did not want to remain in one season for more than a few moments.
I kept walking enjoying the strange world around me.
The strange and wondrous world I lived in began to dissolve.
And then I awoke, but it seemed so real.
Sunken Eyes and Desperate Yawns
As I slowly drift into sleep my thoughts become blank slates for creatures to paint
They alter my innocent dreams and twist them into realistic haunting nightmares
When I wake up the nightmares disappear
but the creatures don't
They take over my daydreams too
I can't close my eyes or I will see terrible things
I stay awake for the sake of my own sanity
What is a dream? Is it something unbelievable? Is it something others want for you, or is it something you want? When I dream I dream of many things. Some being sports, some being girls, and some being cars. However, I’m not talking about those dreams we have in our sleep. I’m talking about the dreams we have of achieving in our life. The dreams we have of getting our dream job, going to the college of our dreams, or dating the girl of our dreams. We all have many dreams but we also have that one dream that we would die to live. Now it may change over time but it will still hold the same meaning and purpose. We all want to achieve some sort of dream but sometimes obstacles stand in our way. There are always going to be those challenges but it is about how we counter those obstacles in order to get to our dream. Sometimes there are those things that stand in our way that people aren’t able to overcome and their dreams then become nightmares. For some it is a bad divorce with the love of their life, for others it may be losing the job of their dreams, and sometimes it’s tearing an ACL and your professional sports dreams goes down the drain. In life there are times where things are unfair and we just have to roll with it, but when your dreams become nightmares it seems like there is no meaning in life. However, I disagree, when one door closes another one opens and it gives you another chance to chase your dream. Take life for what it’s worth and make sure your dreams never become your nightmares.
Can’t go to sleep…
Want to go to sleep…
Can’t go to sleep…
Dreams tease me
I close my eyes for hours
Nothing to do but wait…
Why can’t I simply drift away?
Are the nightmares too strong?
Finally I lose consciousness
A second later…
I regain it
Nothing in between
There was no dream
Are they real?
Are they real?
My eyes close slowly
I wait for it to come back
To creep through the web
Of my skittish thoughts
My heart pulses quietly
Pumping fear through me
The cloud of silence
And black encases me in
A tomb of terror
I feel the nightmare
On the edge of my sleep
I feel the nightmare
You the realest aren't you
Or that's what you think right
What makes you the realest
The fact that you have a limp on your walk
Or the lingo in your speech, but in reality you just can't talk right
You the realest cause you taking lives?
Selling dope, destroying young mans minds?
Or is it the rapping about females, giving them illicit names treating them like a brand you can dog out
You the realest but I'm the wisest
While the wisest fight against black on black crime
The realest start the violence
Over a corner you call yours
Or that block that you never lived on
But you got a trap there so it's all yours
Every moment on your toes
Every crack rock always gets sold
Even to a mother, the realest heart is turning cold
No more sleeping in the trap house
The white is getting to you
The paranoia is rising
Mind screaming what did you get yourself
Started as the realest but slowly turning into a coward
Losing all your money to your new addiction which means you losing power
Your block is gone
The jig is up
Now swats breaking down your trap door
Taking all your riches and dope
You can forget that name you think you worked for..
The Autumn People
When my feet are stumbling and tripping over my dark and beautiful silhouette
It reminds me of laughter again
I sit in bliss just looking
She sits there with me of course and listens because it’s the part of her behind the light
It’s one of the greatest moments of this day, this month, this year and within her universe.
Things have grown and died
Green is dying while orange, yellow, and brown are growing
The wind is louder and roaring
Soon the clocks turn backwards
The darkness is only the beginning of the end
B e w a r e
Now... i’m just dancing with her
Dancing with the essence
She is so powerful yet can be so gentle
T h e
Mother is always there everyday
I keep laughing
Even in the
A u t u m n
She dies slowly and ever so gracefully
For each year she dances with death
I’m lying on a beginning and end
P e o p l e
Can scurry along and sniff the scent forever
I can’t stop laughing
The hound will do so until the scent is found
Only death, could separate them and the mission in the puppy’s eyes
The wind is always talking
The sly fox knows of this sound
And echoes it back
Even the hound knows
You can’t outfox the fox
The wind is roaring to thee in omens through space
It whispers in your ear rejoicing with dreadful and sweet frequencies
I will not stop laughing
B r a d b u r y,
is it true that those who frenzy forth, are such the autumn people?
The devil pierces your skin
angst and apprehension filling my veins;as
the pleasant fall of an uncertain death fills yours
Trapped in a gratifying hell
unseeing of my mental descent
as you lead in this monotonous horror film
me sitting front row seat in attempts to unravel the constant twists in the abyss of your mind; with
You and me both
Living in a dream of our perfect nightmare
"I am now in my reflection. What used to be daydreams are now starry fantasies and what used to be nightmares are now sunlit hauntings." - Sean Vo
I rose calmly from my seat, which had moments before seemed shrouded in darkness, and drew gently back the curtains that framed my window so casually. A soft beam of moonlight crept in on the delicate waft of cool night air that caught my hair by surprise and send my curls dancing around my face. As I turned back to my living room, the one I had spent so much time perfecting and arranging in my few years here in this home, my gaze drifted lazily in and out of focus, my eyes glossing over the details and textures of the room the way one runs their hands over an old black and white photograph. In the pale moonlight it looked as if it was just that, a photograph. Not a thing was out of place as my feet glided softly along the floor as I continued my trance like dance.
I ran my hand absentmindedly against the silky white blanket draped over the back of my couch the material sliding gracefully onto the floor as i dragged it behind me. My mind empty, my face plastered with a bright smile, my eyes hollow. I stopped abruptly at the doorway of my kitchen, the blanket slipping from my hands as the calm of my picturesque home was destroyed by brilliant red blood seeping its way through the cracks of my checkered tile floor. My smile was gone and my eyes came alive with frustration as the thick crimson substance began the delicate work of staining my shoes.
The picture was ruined and my calm was gone I found myself growing more and more agitated as I tried furiously to brush the blood back into the wounded body now lifeless on the floor. What a terrible mess. In a way I almost relished the way it felt, a dark deep mixture that felt alive on it's own without the pounding of a heart. It is a tingling sensation to hold anothers’ life in your hands, physically, when you had already given them your own. I let it wash over my hands and continued to pour it back in until I realised after many minutes of doing exactly that, diligently and repetitively no matter how it continued to flow, my hands had become as stained as my shoes and I was getting nowhere. Calmly I stood, hands dripping, and wiped them against my skirt, brushing down the fabric that draped itself around me like the shadows themselves. I stooped ever so slightly to retrieve the red streaked silk and let it drag softly against the floor behind me. I sat on the couch and accepted defeat. It was a task for another day. I lay my head to rest and close my eyes, trying to grasp any remnants of that photograph in my head as I drifted to sleep.
I awoke from troubled dreams to find the sun intruding through my open curtains. I sat up, my head still spinning and my limbs tangled in a cotton blanket. I sat up on the couch and shook out my tangled curls tumbling freely about my head with no cause or direction. Standing up to change my clothes, realizing I had gone to bed the night before in an old sweater and torn jeans, and found myself watching my liar of a husband fumble in the kitchen for something he couldn’t find with me. I walked mindlessly towards him letting my hands run over the neck of an overturned wine bottle and grasped it loosely in my left turning it over between my fingers. My mind empty, my face plastered with a bright smile, my eyes hollow. The bottle smashed over his head as he dropped to the ground with a satisfying thud. Red blood trickled onto the nice clean checkered floor of my kitchen… What a terrible mess I made. The bottle clinked to the ground
I dream of a world where people are nice to each other.
Where people compliment more than they envy.
Where love is spread more than hate.
A place where war is only seen in movies, not in someone’s backyard.
I dream of a world where shootings are not part of the norm.
Where living in fear is not an option.
Where young people didn’t think of suicide as a way out.
A place where happiness is abundant.
I dream of a world surrounded my love.
Where people did not cheat or leave for no reason.
Where people loved with their whole entire being.
A place where no one gave up on each other, but instead their love grew.
I dream of a world where people felt as if they are good enough.
What Nightmares Mean
When I dream it is often nightmares
Nightmares that haunt me when I'm asleep or awake
That I can not escape
Because I begin to realize that dreams are not real
And the nightmares are signs
Of what have happened or what haven't happened yet
And that terrifies me
“We were once united by similar dreams, but are now divided forever by one nightmare.”
- Sean Vo
I Woke Up
When I was seven
I had a dream that I was a princess
It was a bright fantasy that filled sunny days with
Hushed giggles and off-key Disney songs
That were always overplayed and repetitive
But never bad enough to turn off
A prince so handsome
He made my heart ache
And as he spun me around
The covers rolled off my bed
And I woke up
When I was seventeen
I had a dream that I didn’t hate myself
That death was a frightening bedtime story
Instead of the glowing exit sign
In the back of a movie
That was never bad enough to leave
A friend so kind
He made my heart ache
And as he took my hand
To tell me it would all be okay
The alarm rang on my bedside table
And I woke up
I fear of a world that goes dark.
Where the lights of the city cease to exist.
Where the laughter of newborn babies cease to exist.
A place where sadness is more prominent than happiness.
I fear of a world that stops working.
Where people ditch their jobs to stay in bed to cry.
Where people stop working hard because they stopped caring.
A place where dysfunctional is the new functional.
I fear a place full of hatred.
Where hate is the motive.
Where hate makes people happy.
A place that already started forming.
I fear of a world already created.
There is a place I go that no one else knows
A place hidden with my secrets, fears, and regrets
A cloud of color above my head allows my darkest desires to wander freely,
The ones I'm too afraid to admit to myself
I am not though, afraid of what this place tells me
I welcome these strange ideas with a beaming smile
It’s sad really, the only place I can be myself is in my head.
The safest place for me is suppose to be my dreams, but even there I can't escape you. The miserable truth is when I am awake watching you not notice me, but at least it is honest. My nightmares are the ones where we are together and happy, leaving me to wonder if I mean anything to you when I wake up. Asleep, my mind plays tricks on me. I am living a false life in my head where memories of happiness with you jump me like robbers in the night. I tell myself I hate you but truthfully I hate myself for still loving you. As you run to your dreams, I sit in my nightmares waiting for you.
I hear voices when I turn off the lights
When the warm glow of my lamp
Has been taken over by the darkness
That eats away at every sign of light
And gives the demons in my room
Freedom to take over my thoughts
I am not scared of the dark
The dark is scared of me
Tale of the Golden Heart
There have been many mistakes I have committed in my life. Some mistakes were worse than others. I became a nightmare for people, a monster, and that’s how I saw myself. The one mistake I kept making, however, was failing to do anything about being a monster. I wanted to change, truly I did, but when it came down to it, I fell back into old habits and indulged on my dark impulses once again. After everything that happened, I lost many but kept few. After all that has happened, I kept trying to re-tie the bonds I lost and almost ignored the ones I had. After everything that happened, I became my own nightmare. There’s something you should know. If you have made many mistakes in your life, you will pay the price for them all. Also, after you have taken responsibility for your mistakes, you now know the difference between good and evil and are now caught in between. However, in the end, if you learned a great lesson, then those mistakes turn out to be worth it; even if you have destroyed some bonds forever. If there was ever an opportunity to turn back time and reverse my mistakes, at first I would say “yes.” However, the more I think about it, I wouldn’t go through with it now; if I did, I would have never learned those lessons and strive to become the person I desire to be now. However, all I want now is forgiveness, even though I know it’s not possible anymore. After the many signs I saw to move on, I have to finally try. I have to do something about it, and try not to be the monster anymore. But it’s so hard trying to forgive myself knowing each day I did these horrible things and I would never be forgiven.
I’m only human.
Give me a break.
I’m only human.
We all make mistakes.
I’m only human.
We all have a dark side.
I’m only human.
I’m only... human.
I think I’ve made my decision. I’m going to stop holding onto hate and start fighting against my darkness. All of my mistakes helped me see the darkness in my soul. All of my mistakes helped me see that I was the only one standing in the way of my own happiness. I’ve spent too long wandering in my own nightmares. I need to start dreaming about the pleasant things, and trying to make them come true. I think I finally realized what has been missing. I need to start opening my heart up to love and let go of all this hate I have. I need to stop filling myself with fear of what might be and start living my life holding onto hope that I can one day see the sunshine behind these stormy clouds. I need to let go of this darkness. It may be easier said than done, but once I find a way, I will see the sunshine and blue skies, that meadow and oak tree, those calm seas while sailing on... all of the symbols of peace I have created for myself to strive for. From this day on, I am willing to fight for my happiness, and that fight will begin when I give myself a fresh start. This happiness I want, this person I want to become, is inspiring, loving, honest, brave, and strong-willed. And now, instead of waiting for the sun to shine after the storm, I will start looking for it. I will start finding my pleasant dreams, and I will start walking on this path to peace. For love, for hope, for good, I will try to inspire and just be.
Under The Bed
Leave me alone
I am scared
Don’t wanna sleep
Wanna stay up with the light
See dad, the monsters are real
These are my worst nightmares
Monsters, leave me alone
Anymore under the bed??...
People who think of nightmares
Often think of terrifying dreams
That involve terrifying monsters
What do I think of?
Thinking about waking up everyday
And doing everything the same
Trapped in your own world, held down by chains
Like ones kept in a murderer's basement
That society had locked you in and threw away the key
That to me is scarier than any nightmare in my dreams
My Dream Starts….
My dream starts with me running
Someone is chasing me
Like every horror movie victim, I trip and fall multiple times
I turn around as I’m running to see if they’re still after me
They are, and they’re gaining speed
I keep running until my legs burn
I don’t look back again
Ahead of me I see a void of darkness
I don’t want to run into it but I don’t want them to catch up to me
So I run, and run until I’m plunged into the darkness
I wake up tied to a chair, with cuts and bruises covering my arms
Looking up I see a person in a mask
They move closer and suddenly remove it
Their face is pixelated and distorted
I can’t make out who they are
They pull at the corner of their face as if to pull off another mask
And just before they do
First and Last
My first dream quickly betrayed me
I was ready to be happy
To be blown away
By this ‘dream’
Then I saw him
Lurking in the darkest corner
Staring at me in my safe haven
His creepy eyes pierced through me
He shouldn’t be here
He was finally gone
Was this my chance?
To explain how I truly felt?
A chase began through familiar halls
He chased me until dawn
My eyes finally open
I hope to never dream again
Dreamcatchers originated in Native American culture with the Ojibwe people. It was intended to protect a dreamer from nightmares. The good dreams would pass through the holes of the dreamcatcher and glide down the feathers to the sleeper below, while the bad dreams would get caught in the web. Enjoy these dreamcatchers from the Pathways students for some sweet dreams.